Monday, August 1, 2016

7 Most Dangerous Holiday Flirts


Everything is different when you are on vacation. Women go for guys they would stay clear off at home. After three mojitos and two sunshine reggae, we become easy targets for them. Here are some of the most dangerous holiday flirts:

7 men women only dig on vacations


The Singer


7 Men Women only dig on VacationWhere you meet him: The Bahamas, Gili Islands

Defining features: Dreadlocks are covering half of his back. Big Grin. Red eyes.

That fascinates us: He´s the front man of a Bob-Marley-cover band and ... there is just something about him. What catches the eye: There are only women in the front row. Everyone wants him. Because he stands for hunger for life, easiness, and sex. The opposite of the guys in suit and pale nerds that are hitting on us at home. You just want to be a supporting act with your air guitar. Every night.

How he gets us: Was he just singing ONLY for you and look you straight in the eyes?

That´s the rub: You are one of many. Draw a number.

The Holiday Entertainer


Where you meet him: Mallorca and any other beach or pool

Defining features: Trunks, megaphone

That fascinates us: His trained body. You see his muscles when he screams "Let´s start the parrrteeey" in his stupid megaphone

How he gets us:  A private tour of the all-inclusive hotel with stops at every bar where he treats us to a "Sex on the beach" with a wink.

That´s the rub: He talks too loud even without his stupid megaphone. His first name is Kevin, and he lives with his mom. He´s an entertainer in bed also: "Let´s go!" "Alright!" and you cannot decide if you are afraid or excited that you will get deaf if Kevin keeps on screaming.

The Enlightened One


Where you meet him: India, Ibiza, Cambodia (meditating)

Defining features: Insightful tattoos ("You only live once"), colorful hippie clothes, feather in his hair

That fascinates us: He left the materialistic, capitalistic world behind to study in an ashram and become a yoga teacher.

How he gets us: He shares enlightening insights nonstop, treats you to a green smoothie, eats grilled grasshoppers and presents himself as the all-knowing cool sock. And his name is Rajneesh.

That´s the rub: His free way of living and his braveness are like an aphrodisiac to you. Until you realize that he is also just on the run from his old "me" (including an ex-wife, kids, and debt). His name is not Rajneesh. It´s Kevin.

The Barkeeper


Where you meet him: Spain, Turkey, Miami, Italy

Defining features: Cocktail shaker

That fascinates us: "Do you have a happy hour?" you ask the young man behind the bar. "No, but always a happy ending," he replies while he looks at you as if the sun just started rising. After a moment of consideration, you order a Caipi.
7 Most Dangerous Holiday Flirts

How he gets us:  After the third Caipi he´ll invite you for a walk. His shift is over, and he offers to show you that fantastic, protected bay.
Even though you know that he probably has a lot of routine with tourist ladies you get dizzy when he takes your hand.

That´s the rub: He´s a romantic. He is so romantic that he loves unprotected sex to feel you even more intense. That jerk.

The Latin Lover


Where you meet him: Argentina, Mexico, Brasil ...

Defining features: Guitar, gold chain

That fascinates us: He plays the guitar like a god, and he plays for you. Love songs. He calls you "Hermosa."

How he gets us:  He opened up about his awful childhood in the slums and how his first love got shot by a rivaling gang. Now he makes a living with odd jobs

That´s the rub: Dates with him are reminiscent of therapy sessions. He talks about his childhood for hours and hours and bursts to tears from time to time.

The Surf Instructor


Where you meet him: Where do you not meet him? Wherever there´s water and waves.

Defining features: Blond hair, surfboard, flip flops

That fascinates us: He knows the ocean like his garden, he is a real nature boy. In the knee-deep water, he takes our hand and whispers that we can trust him and that he takes care of us - whatever happens. Sigh.

How he gets us:  Intensive body contact during the dry run does the rest.

That´s the rub: Big promises, small penis. Sigh.


The Tour Guide


Where you meet him: Kenia, Tanzania

Defining features: He knows his way around

That fascinates us: At his side, you climb the Kilimanjaro. He takes you to the Serengeti Park, shows you lions and a world you have never seen before.

How he gets you: The magic of the first time is omni present.
That´s the rub: He became a tour guide to get easier to the Mzungus/Gringos. He has several other girlfriends in the US that send money for his "sick grandma."

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